Teshuvah is a tool that we can use to heal and improve our relationship with Hashem. Our neshamos want nothing more than to reconnect deeply with Hashem. A teshuvah that creates this connection is a teshuvah that will feel amazing and leave us feeling lighter, happier, and closer.
The Rambam writes in the second perek of Hilchos Teshuvah (2:1): “What is considered complete teshuvah? It is when a person is confronted with the aveirah that he previously fell to and distances himself and doesn’t do it.” Seemingly, the Rambam is saying that in order for us to do a complete teshuvah, we have to be in the same situation with the same variables and succeed in not succumbing. But what if we don’t find ourselves in a scenario where all the variables line up to challenge us in the same way?
Even if we don’t find ourselves tempted by the same sin we fell for in the past, perhaps we can proactively choose to come closer to Hashem in a way that is similar to the Rambam’s approach. No – definitely not by finding an opportunity to tempt ourselves, and pushing ourselves to overcome! Try a unique tool to come closer to Hashem using “Corrective Imagery Therapy” on yourself. This technique enables us to go back in our minds to an experience that we are unhappy with, and correct it using the power of imagination. This therapy can be used as part of our teshuvah process and can feel very good when we do it – because it is an exercise that helps us to actively improve our relationship with Hashem.
Here’s how to do it. You might find it easiest to do this in a quiet place, with your eyes closed. Think about a specific bad choice you made, something you did that created distance between you and Hashem. Now try to relive that moment right before you made that decision. Kindly ask yourself, “What do I really want right now? What is my neshamah craving?” Envision yourself making the right choice, the one that reflects the innermost desire of your neshamah, the one that will bring you closer to Hashem. Play out in your mind what would have happened next. How would that have felt? What issues would you have avoided, such as the feelings of regret that so often come with bad decisions or any other negative outcomes. Feel the emotions that come with overcoming the temptations of the yetzer hara and making the choice that you really wanted to make in the first place.
Allow yourself to replay the film of that moment in your mind, with you guiding yourself to make the better choice. In that sense, this technique reflects the approach of the Rambam – it is the same situation, with the same temptation, and here you make the right decision. Bring Hashem into the picture: Hashem, I know I made the wrong decision the first time. Please see that I am bothered by that decision, and I am replaying the scene in my mind and demonstrating how I could and should have reacted to that temptation. Please help to make the right choice the first time when I am challenged by my yetzer hara in the future. I may have strayed from You then, but I am returning to You now. Help me act in accordance with my innermost desire; to live a life of closeness to You and to follow Your ways.
This article was found in Nekuda Tova Issue 7.