I want a lot of bracha in my life. I want shefa, bracha, parnassa, and all good things, in ruchniyus and in gashmiyus. I’ve always thought the simplest pathway to all that was to be direct and ask Hashem.
But a recent teaching from Rabbi Shlomo Yehuda Be’eri (“the Yenuka”) threw me off course, when he instructed that one shouldn’t demand bracha from Hashem without being an adequate Kli — vessel — for it. It’s the concept of ‘Dchikas Shaah — forcing the time,’ wanting things that are beyond our capacities to receive them, and wanting them now. It’s possible for people to beg and beg Hashem for specific brachos, and then get them, but it turns out it’s not good for them. Or in the long run, they lose out afterwards. He shared that it’s important to make space within yourself and expand your vessel, by talking to Hashem with humility, asking Him to bring bracha to your life, in a way that is good for you, all at the right time.
Pushing Hashem to provide from a place of fear, stress, and urgency only compounds the pressure within the situation. Instead, the advice is to daven with composure. Gently, calmly, without stress. Know that in life we go through challenges, and the goal is not to panic over them. Instead, we make room in our hearts for what Hashem is trying to tell us through our circumstances. We submit to Hashem’s will, and we daven. ‘Hashem, please do good for me, have mercy on me, I’ve made mistakes, and I need your compassion here.’ This method of communication appeases Hashem, and allows for things to unfold in the proper time.
Upon learning this, I immediately prayed, “I want to be a kli to hold all the brachos you want to give me, Hashem. Help me grow to be able to hold all the bracha.”
My request for help developing my vessel brought me to the Mishnah in Uktzin, which states that Hashem found no better vessel to hold blessings for Klal Yisroel other than Shalom, peace. Only Shalom is the ‘kli machzik bracha.’
I found this relieving and instructive. Relieving because the concept of ‘being a vessel’ is much more tangible now. Now I have a practical application of it. And instructive because it gives me a specific field of growth to focus on.
Shalom can be experienced in multiple ways on multiple levels, let’s briefly traverse a few that have practical application to our day to day lives: Shalom Bayis, Shalom within oneself, and Shalom with other Yidden.
Shalom Bayis – Peace in the home. If it is important enough that Hashem is willing to erase His name for it, then it’s definitely worth focusing on. If there comes a time in the near future, when you know that you’re right, you know that you’re right, but you remember this article, hold your lips together and don’t argue. Instead, say to Hashem, “Hashem, I’m staying quiet for the sake of Shalom right now. Please make our home a kli that can hold more bracha.” Lose the argument, win the bracha.
Shalom within oneself. Am I at peace with myself? Do I talk to myself nicely? Do I reject parts of myself? It’s natural and logical that a person who is more centered, grounded, and at peace with themselves is a much more of a magnet for opportunities for great things, and all their interpersonal relationships are improved.
Shalom with other Yidden. I may not lash out at other Jews in the comments section, but do I feel a sense of harmony with them? Do I appreciate them? Do I help bring peace between Jews?
What is the quintessential bracha? One that Hashem blesses us with, kohanim bless the nation with, and parents bless their children with? “Yivarechica Hashem V’yishmarecha…. V’yasem lecha Shalom.” Hashem will bless you, watch over you, shine His light upon, grant favor to you, raise His face towards you…. and He will give you peace! At the end of Hashem’s very own blessing to us, is that we should have Shalom — the very vessel to make us be able to hold all the other blessings.
This article was found in Nekuda Tova Issue 85.
