Q&A with Beyam Darkecha

In last week’s issue, the B’yam Darkecha explained how our avodah during the month of Elul can bring us a tikkun for our shortcomings throughout the entire year. Now, the Rebbe explains how we can use this month to prepare ourselves for the year ahead: 

As we look towards the year ahead, we need to see the opportunities as being entirely new, and not merely as a continuation of the avodah of this past year. Every year has its special avodah and mission. One should see the year ahead as an opportunity for an entirely new level of closeness with Hashem, a connection of love and awe (ahava v’yira). 

One should prepare himself for the new year by clarifying for himself that everything he does in the coming year, including all his ‘mundane’ affairs, like sleeping and bringing a livelihood for his family, will be done with Hashem! 

 The yetzer hara likes to tell us that real avodah Hashem means to be poresh, to abstain from any enjoyment of this world. But really the opposite is true! There is nothing as geshmak as avodas Hashem, and nothing as bitter as the pleasure the yetzer hara is offering you!!

When one enjoys this world but is always connected to Hashem, he is taking the most elevated capability that exists (pleasure) and bringing it close to Hashem. Taanug (pleasure) is the most elevated middah in existence – it manifests from Kesser, which is the most lofty revelation of Hashem! And when one elevates the koach hataanug, and engages in all mundane things with Hashem, he is doing the greatest avodah ever! 

This is where we should put our positive efforts towards as we approach Rosh Hashanah. This is truly the most befitting inauguration for Hashem’s new kingship!

Question:

Every year when the Selichos days come, I find it very hard to connect to the words of Selichos. They are very hard to understand, and even when I do understand what I am saying, I have a hard time relating to it. 

Answer:

The main avodah of Selichos is to pour out our hearts to Hashem. One should focus much more on that than on how many selichos he says. Chazal teach us טוב מעט בכוונה מהרבה שלא בכוונה, itis it  is better to do less with more intention than more without intention. Try to look for the selichos that talk to you, sometimes it could be the pesukim at the beginning or “Aneinu” at the end, sometimes even “Ashrei.” The main thing is to try to be in touch with yourself and try to say the selichos you feel connected to, and if possible you can finish the other ones later. The order does not matter. You can say them whatever order talks to you most. 

Another point is, that sometimes the fact that one feels a total disconnect is actually part of the avodah, because this brings one to feel like a baby who doesn’t know the reason why he is screaming to his mother, but that is his instinct: I scream and Mommy will help!

So even if you can’t articulate exactly what you are doing, you know that you are screaming to your dear Father and asking Him to forgive you for what you have done, and He will definitely forgive you! This kind of scream is a special avodah in itself.

There is another way to connect, and that is by deciding beforehand that you are going to say Selichos with “kabolas ohl,” a determined decision to say Selichos even if you don’t connect to it because this is what has to be done. This approach can bring an ohr into your nefesh too, similar to the feeling one has when he makes his mind up to learn something like Daf Yomi etc. and he gets it done. He can get filled up with a certain ohr of kabolas ohl. {Ed. note: in other words, the very decision to say Selichos even though you don’t get an ohr (spiritual pleasure) from it can in fact bring you ohr. But even if it doesn’t, it is an important middah in avodas Hashem to be able to push yourself to act because that is what Hashem wants us to do, even if we don’t connect deeply to that particular mitzvah at the moment.}