Once upon a time, my wife and I went on a short, very, very overdue vacation. Naturally, we set up our kids with a babysitter they know well and a very large budget for pizza.
Now, at the time, one of our kids had a real problem getting ready on time in the morning. And in the afternoon. And the rest of the day. Advil made a mint off of me during that time.
We were working on getting to understand this little guy, and starting to realize just how much the need for attention fuels him. So we decided to ask him straight, “Tzadik’l, do you think you’re going to have a hard time getting ready on time in the morning when we’re away?” He smiled a somewhat evil smile, and answered, “Of course not!”
And indeed, believe it or not, he had no issue at all with the babysitter. Not one problem… the whole time. He was ready for each bus, each activity, each bed time, on schedule and without hassle.
ADHD. Defiance. Rebellion. Insecure Attachment. Could be. But the truth is, at least in this case, it was just about attention.
I’m no expert, but I know that if this boy of mine acts up around me, I should be taking it as a big compliment. He’s having a great time pushing my buttons. I am clearly the best toy he’s got, and indeed, he knows how to get a daily light and sound show out of me.
He’s comfortable with me. He’s secure. So he can let loose. But around strangers? There’s no fun getting a reaction. And without the fun, there’s no point in fighting.
This article was found in Nekuda Tova Nekuda Tova Listing.
