The שטן is in Paris

I like to try and track the yetzer hara’s tactics. He’s a slippery strategist, but being able to spot his moves sets me up for an easier battle. I first became aware of the yetzer hara as a force that was strategically trying to mess with us from a poster that was hanging in my high school hallway. The poster described the Satan in Paris, sitting in on all the big fashion designers’ meetings, and advising them on which styles to introduce that would trip up girls in their tzniyus. At that time, a specific fashion was all the rage, and we were all struggling with the halachically questionable elements of it. This poster was there to help us understand that this nisayon was a worthy and sophisticated battle coming straight from the Satan in Paris. At a certain point, the Satan must have moved on, because that trend became far less ‘in,’ and high school girls today get to enjoy the reprieve. 

Now, I’m in the stage of life where I am dreaming up an Upsherin haircut for my son, and I’m pretty sure that wherever the committees are that sit and decide which boys’ haircuts are fashionable, the Satan has parked himself there too. It’s actually remarkable. If you look up ‘top trending boys haircuts,’ you will see one very glaring common denominator amongst the broader society: the sideburns and special areas that we call ‘payos’ are shaved off to create ‘the look.’ Hair in front, totally fine. Hair growing down the back, also fine. But analyze the trending haircuts and notice that it looks like they are following an invisible rule — almost no hair should be found on the sides of boys’ heads, right next to and above their ears. There must be some inyan with the ko’ach of payos nowadays if the Satan is manipulating all popular hairstyles to avoid them at all costs. 

Everything in this world was created zeh leumas zeh — equal and opposite. Wherever we have the potential for good, there is an equal and opposite potential for bad. Wherever there is a koach for kedusha, there is a counter ko’ach for tumah. Our bechira stands in the tension right between these two forces. If there is an area where the Satan is fighting at full force, that indicates that the kedusha behind that inyan is very, very strong. It must be very worthwhile for us to double down on areas that the Satan is doing whatever he can to mess us up in. 

This awareness helps fashion a two-pronged battle plan. First, noticing and calling out something as ‘the yetzer hara’s agenda’ makes it easier to withstand the temptation. I don’t want to stoop to things that are so clearly the yetzer hara’s attempts to trip me up. Once I know something is just the Satan dressed up, I’m far less drawn in by his tactics. 

Second, it clues us in to the power and potential to actually address what the Satan is fighting. Once I notice that the Satan is fighting so hard in the hairstyle department, it motivates me to learn more about the mitzvah of payos, and reinforce my commitment to it when I help prepare my little boy for a life of avodas Hashem, alongside his yarmulke and tzitzis. If the yetzer hara fights me daily in tefillah, making me scattered and distracted, I know it must be that I have the potential to daven a crazy-focused, powerful tefillah. If the yetzer hara weasels his way into my Friday afternoons, creating tension and frazzle, it’s as if he’s waving a giant blinking sign saying, “There is potential for kedusha here! Something big is happening in this house!” I notice the invisible glowing sign, and it jolts me back into the ring, so I can choose to steel my nerves and react calmly to the soup nuts spilled everywhere-but-in-the-chicken-soup bowl, and the “what do you mean the Nekuda Tova needs to go to print right now?!”

Wherever you notice the yetzer hara showing up and making a big deal over something, ask yourself, “What is the yetzer hara so focused on right here? What is he seeing? Can I sneak past him and seek to strengthen myself in whichever area he is trying to mark as his territory?”