Stories of Tzadikim with Harav yussie zakutinsky
Reb Herschel of Zitichov was once sitting by his Lag Ba’omer tish, and he shared the following gematria with his Chassidim. The words ידיד נפש אב הרחמן The Beloved of our soul, merciful Father has the same gematria as רבי שמעון בר יוחאי.
One of the Chassidim quickly did the math in his mind, and discovered that this wasn’t exactly accurate, as the gematria of ידיד נפש אב הרחמן is 765 whereas רבי שמעון בר יוחאי is 766! But before he could even decide if he should say anything, the Rebbe turned to him, and said “I know that you are thinking that the calculation is off by 1, but you are spelling יוחאי with an “Alef,” as it is spelled in the Zohar Hakadosh, but in the Gemara you find his name recorded without that “Alef,” and with this spelling the two phrases have the same gematria of 765.”
What can we learn from this story? Why is it that specifically the way Reb Shimon’s name is spelled in the Gemara, and not the spelling of the Zohar, is what equals the gematria of Yedid Nefesh?
The Zohar Hakadosh is full of teachings of Reb Shimon that describe an environment of light. Even the word “Zohar” itself means light! These Torahs came from Reb Shimon in an environment that represents light. The Gemara, on the other hand, deals with environments that often do not represent light. Chazal teach us במחשכים הושיבני – זה תלמוד בבלי, The passuk says “Hashem, you placed me in darkness,” and the Gemara explains that this is a reference to Talmud Bavli.
Just like in a relationship between husband and wife, sometimes the relationship is full of light, but sometimes you’re focused on all the ‘nitty gritty work,’ like taking care of the house and kids, earning a livelihood, and so on. These moments aren’t the beautiful experiences of pure light, but they are also an important part of the relationship. A sign of true love is when people are happy with each other at all times, even when they deal with the nitty gritty of life.
Whereas the Zohar represents our relationship with Hashem when it is filled with light, the Talmud Bavli represents the nitty gritty. The sign of true love between us and Hashem, the relationship of The Beloved of our soul, merciful Father, is not the love of light that is the Zohar Hakadosh. It is specifically the Rabbi Shimon of Talmud Bavli, the love for Hashem even throughout the nitty gritty of that relationship, and the darkness and heavy lifting of Talmud Bavli, that demonstrates the true depth of the relationship.
It’s our involvement in Talmud Bavli, our willingness to deal with difficult, confusing, dark situations, for Hashem’s sake, that really demonstrates our relationship of “Yedid nefesh av harachamon.”
Take It To Go!
In the zechus of Reb Shimon Bar Yochai, and all the Tzadikim, we should be zocheh to feel our connection to the Rebono Shel Olam as our Yedid nefesh av harachamon, even if we are in an environment of darkness. And may Hashem respond in kind, to always respond to us as His yedid nefesh, as His beloved children, with the coming of Moshiach biveas go’el tzedek bimheira biyamainu amen.
This article was found in Nekuda Tova Issue 79 – Lag Ba’omer.
