“If someone is too tired to give you a smile, leave one of your own, because no one needs a smile as much as those who have none to give.”
The minhag Yisroel is to eat fruits on Tu B’Shevat. It’s easier to understand why we eat sweet fruits, but what is harder to understand is why there is also a minhag to eat bokser (carob), which is dry, is not sweet at all, and is not even one of the shivas haminim. What additional insight can be gained by understanding why this fruit has developed as part of the minhagim of this holy day?
We know that typically children prefer fruits over vegetables. The apparent reason for this is because fruits are much sweeter than vegetables. But there is something deeper as well.
Sweetness comes from renewal. Human nature is to enjoy something new, to be more excited about new opportunities, ideas, and experiences than when we just repeat the “same old” again and again.
You might therefore think that there is more “renewal” by a plant/tree that grows fruits rather than vegetables. But the truth is the exact opposite. According to halacha, we only make a borei pri ha’etz on a tree that lasts from year to year, and not on one that dies out and is renewed every year (those we make a boreh pri ha’adama on).
Since the chitzonius, the taste of the fruit is sweet, and sweetness is generally associated with a sense of renewal, what is the message in the fact that the pnimiyus identity of a fruit tree is only a tree that lasts for years and is not renewed every year?
The Rashash taught many specific inner intentions (kavanos) that one has in various mitzvos and parts of davening. Very often you will come across kavanos in the Rashash that are repetitive. As an example, when making Kiddush on Friday night, you have the same kavanos when saying the words “סברי מרנן” as you do when you say the bracha of hagafen. What is the purpose of repeating the same kavanos?
The Toras Chochom (סד ע”ב) explains that when you get to a new place in avodah, you naturally feel the sweetness of renewal, the excitement of a new opportunity and level in avodas Hashem. The first, new kavana always feels more geshmak.
Afterwards, the freshness fades away, and repeating the same experience — or the same kavana — may not feel as geshmak. But that is only on an external level. The truth is that the more we focus on and repeat something, the more it is internalized in the depth of our heart and consciousness. We may not have the more chitzonius enjoyment, but we do have the sweetness of making something a part of ourselves in a very powerful way.
As an example: When singing a song, there is a geshmak when you start singing a new song, and each time you switch to sing another song there is the enjoyment of the newness of a new one. But when you sing the same song over and over again, even though you won’t have the freshness of a new song, you experience the much deeper and longer lasting enjoyment of internalizing the message of the song. This only happens when we repeat it again and again.
With all this we can better understand the apparent contradiction in the nature of a fruit tree. The highest level of sweetness does not, in fact, come from renewal, but rather from the long lasting, inner pleasure of repeating something again and again to fully internalize its message in our heart. The sweet fruit tree lasts year to year, and does not die out and require renewal each year like vegetables do.
Children have a strong spiritual sense, and the pnimiyus of their enjoyment of fruit more than vegetables is because they sense that the highest level of sweetness comes from something long lasting that does not rapidly change.
Sometimes, though, it feels like we are repeating the same thing again and again without feeling any sweetness at all, without even being able to even understand that we are internalizing something in a deep way. Sometimes the whole avodah can feel “dry and empty.” This is what is symbolized by the bokser, which is dry and does not have the sweetness of other fruit. Nevertheless, part of the message of Tu B’Shevat is to eat bokser. What is the lesson here?
The answer is that everything we’ve explained until now, including the sweetness of a new beginning and the even deeper sweetness of repeating and thereby internalizing an avodah, is relevant when we are in a ‘regular’ state of avodas Hashem. We naturally have ups and downs and times that we feel the sweetness more and times we feel it less.
But the secret of the bokser is the experience of being in a place that is so lofty that all there is is the infinite light of Hashem. At the level of absolute Ein Od Milvado, there does not exist anything else — not even the emotions of sweetness and enjoyment.
The bokser teaches us about a time when a Yid feels like he is doing the same avodah again and again, and pushes forward even though he does not feel neither the sweetness generated from renewal, nor the sweetness of deep internalization. Sometimes a Yid feels like a dried out bokser, which the gemara teaches us only produces fruit after decades of being planted.
In times like that we should encourage ourselves by remembering that these are times when we are elevated to a higher place, a level of Ein Sof, so high that it is above the concept of sweetness.
Take it to go!
On Tu B’Shevat we can learn many lessons from the trees and the minhagim of the day. One lesson we learn is that even though our avodah feels sweeter and more enjoyable when it comes with a sense of renewal, the truth is that the way to truly internalize our Torah and mitzvos is specifically through repetition. Although the excitement fades away when we repeat things, it is this repetition that brings us to internalize it deeply, and this leads to much deeper and longer lasting satisfaction and growth.
But even when we feel like a bokser, dried out and lacking both the sweetness of the renewal and the sweetness of deep internalizing, and feeling like we are in a state of “not producing fruit for 70 years,” we should encourage ourselves with the knowledge that times like that are not truly unproductive. On the contrary, at times like that, we have the opportunity to be elevated to a level of Ein Sof, a place of avodah that is far above the emotion of sweetness and pleasure in avodas Hashem.
This article was found in Nekuda Tova Issue 68.
