The Gemara (Shabbos 23b) teaches us that if one cannot afford to buy both candles for Shabbos and wine for Kiddush, he should use his money to buy and light Shabbos candles. Shabbos candles, which provide light in the home, are there to ensure shalom bayis, and shalom bayis takes precedence over wine for kiddush.
The Mahar”i Engel asks, why is the reason for this halacha because of shalom bayis? You can determine the same halacha using the general principle of “mitzvah haba liyadcha al tachmitzena,” which teaches us not to let a mitzvah opportunity that comes to our hands go to waste. The mitzvah of lighting Shabbos candles comes first, as it is done before Shabbos starts, so for that reason alone, we should know to use our money for the first mitzvah.
He answers that even though the action of the mitzvah of lighting Shabbos candles takes place before Shabbos, the fulfillment of the mitzvah only takes place after it gets dark on Shabbos itself, which is the same exact time that the mitzvah of kiddush takes effect. Therefore, we need the reason of shalom bayis to explain why buying Shabbos candles takes precedence over buying wine for kiddush.
We learn this concept as well from the Nimukei Yosef (on the Rif in Baba Kama 10a). The Gemara teaches us that even though a fire spreads on its own, the person who ignites the fire is responsible for the damage it causes because it was his energy that lit the fire, and therefore, it is considered his energy that carries it forward, even though he doesn’t actively spread it.
The Nemukei Yosef asks that if that is the case, that if one lights a fire, it is considered as if he did the action of lighting it as it continues to burn, how can we light Shabbos candles before Shabbos? Since it continues to burn on Shabbos, it will be as if we continue to light a fire on Shabbos!
He answers that it’s not that the action of lighting the fire continues while the fire is burning, but rather when he lit the fire (before Shabbos), contained in that action was the action of lighting it for as long as it will burn. So his entire action took place on Erev Shabbos. But as we explained, the fulfillment of the mitzvah takes place only on Shabbos itself. When Shabbos arrives, and the Shabbos candles are lit, the person is not considered to be the one who lit it then (because if so, he would be considered to be violating Shabbos), so in that sense it is as if it ignited itself. Nevertheless since the person did his part before Shabbos, he is credited for the mitzvah.
In a deeper sense, the 6 days of the week allude to Moshiach ben Yosef, which is represented by the middah of yesod, which is our ability to act and operate in this world. Shabbos represents the middah of malchus, which is when the light of Hashem is revealed on its own, without us having to act and do things to reveal Him (Moshiach ben Dovid).
You might think our actions represented by Moshiach ben Yosef are what bring about Moshiach ben Dovid. But the Shabbos candles teach us that even though we do our part during the week — we operate and do mitzvos as we try to bring moshiach, we are doing the work of Moshiach ben Yosef. But when Moshiach ben Dovid arrives to reveal the malchus of Hashem, that happens on “its own.” Yes, we do actions to reveal Hashem, but ultimately Hashem reveals Himself. When we do mitzvos, we are essentially preparing the space for Hashem to reveal Himself.
The holy Shabbos candles whisper this message to us. We need to light the fire, but then it is considered as if the fire lit itself — yet we get credit for it! This same structure is the balancing act of shalom bayis; a world where everyone does their part, and every single part is needed. When we see the value of every Yid and their unique mission, that will lead to the ultimate shalom bayis amongst the Jewish people, without seeing someone else’s mission as detracting from mine.
Shabbos candles ensure peace in the home, and that takes precedence to Kiddush.
The Bottom Line
The Shabbos candles teach us the balancing act of a world where everyone does their part, and every part is needed. We see every Yid and their unique avodah as playing a crucial role that does not in any way take away from my unique role.
This article was found in Nekuda Tova Issue 71.
