The Egyptians attached great significance and honor to their firstborns, and in this week’s parsha every single Egyptian firstborn was killed. Of course, this was a big blow to the Egyptians, and led to them freeing the Jewish people, but something much deeper was also taking place.
The firstborns of Mitzrayim represented the Bechor D’klipah, the evil side of the concept of Bechor. Their death freed the Jewish people, who represent Bechor D’kedusha: “B’ni bechori Yisroel, the holy firstborn child of Hashem.” What is so significant about the concept of bechor?
There are two core components within the concept of bechor. The first is that it represents the opportunity of renewal. When we start a new project or endeavor, we have the ability to give it our all with excitement and passion! Whether it’s a new week or a new year, a mitzvah opportunity or a new commitment, we demonstrate our real desires through new beginnings. This gives us the power to continue on, and the energy we invest in a new beginning can power its entirety.
The second idea that bechor represents is the ability to look back at the beginning and remind yourself of the original desire and intention. Since we demonstrate our real desires through new beginnings, even if we then go astray and veer from our original plan, we can look back to recalculate our spiritual GPS, get back on track, and renew ourselves.
The yetzer hara tries to utilize Bechor D’klipah against us. When we aren’t doing well spiritually, he takes the opportunity to remind us of every bad thing that ever happened to us. He reminds us of spiritual challenges we failed to overcome, and tries to break us with our “criminal record.” He uses this power of recall to push us to give up hope, and encourages us to ‘renew ourselves’ – by doing more and more aveiros! This false and manipulated mindset is the Egyptian Bechor D’klipah which needed to be destroyed in order to redeem the Bechor D’kedusha, b’ni bechori Yisroel, the holy firstborn child of Hashem.
The ‘criminal record’ the yetzer hara tries to show us is a false use of the concept of Bechor for the simple reason that it fails to represent our true, original, desire! Even while sinning a Yid doesn’t have a deep desire to sin!
At a time that we aren’t doing well spiritually, our mission is to reject the Bechor D’klipah nonsense of the yetzer hara, and to instead reach for Bechor D’kedusha. We do this by reminding ourselves of other moments in the past when we were struggling spiritually, and Hashem helped us get through it. We do this by reminding ourselves how much we have grown and improved over time, of old spiritual challenges that we don’t struggle with anymore.
This is the deeper message of “אהיה אשר אהיה , I was as I shall be.” Just as Hashem took us out of Mitzrayim, He will continue to be there for, and rescue, the Jewish people. On an individual level, the message is: “Just as Hashem has helped you through difficult situations in your past, He will help you through this one.”
Take it to Go: The yetzer hara tries to remind us of our past with external eyes. We must reject this perspective and instead look at the inner dimension of even a difficult past, to see that our deepest desire was always for Hashem. Then our mission is to “sanctify the firstborn for Hashem,” by reminding ourselves of all the growth we’ve had in the past and all the times Hashem got us out of difficult situations.
This article was found in Nekuda Tova Issue 22.
